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why is my life forever so shitty? it's so BLOODY RUTTY!! i hate it so bad. why am i always being so negative? i wasnt like this before. i know there was a period last year when i thought things couldnt get any worse, but it just did. everyday i go to sch and nic and i will start mourning abt everything. then we look ard and will wonder why is everyone else so happy? and why are we not? joce is also almost forever happy and cheerful. then why is me and nic always so sad? there's hardly any moment now that i was truely happy and stuff. the only day in the WHOLE year so far is the day we went out with gen. me joce joan nic and gen. but guess what. it only lasted for a day. ONE BLOODY DAY. then, when you turn around, it's gone. back to my stupid routine EVERYDAMMITDAY. It's also not as though i enjoy going through this. and i hate feeling so crappy forever. i miss my childhood days so bad. =(((( i know they'll never come back. good things dont last forever. after a while, they're taken away from you without fail. you see? how effing cruel life is. I guess it is partly my fault. For not appreciating everything until they are taken away from me. but why? WHY must they be taken away? i miss those times. i actually DID those things. omgg. i want to do it again! but you know what. it's impossible. in fact, it's FAR from impossible. it wont happen agn. that's how mean life is. AHH. effinghell.i want the old you back. Though I'm sure of what I feel Never thought a love so true felt so unreal And I'm a little afraid myself But if you love me day by day With an honest heart and just a little faith Baby time will tell the tale
